Hockey au bout du Monde

That’s hockey at the end of the World for my non-French speaking followers.

I once watched (via the internet) England playing a World Cup qualifier in Chile on a pitch with huge jagged peaks around. And I once played a memorable match in Cromwell, on South Island New Zealand, as the sun went down on a background of high snow-covered mountains. They both seemed more at the edge of the world than La Baule – but sometimes it feels like we’re there as well.

The Loire passes through Nantes and reaches the sea at St. Nazaire, turn right and you’ll find La Baule, a classy seaside town with a great beach and, in the Salines area, a sports centre with a huge boulodrome, an indoor sports hall and a rugby pitch that doubles for a hockey pitch (their lines are white and ours are pink). We are the most westerly club in France – miss us and the next time you’ll see the game will be in Boston or Baltimore in the US.

Hockey has about 85,000 regular players in the UK, France has just 7,500, many of them around Paris and the region to the north. Clubs are much more geographically spread out in the Pays de Loire league that we play in – the guys can’t believe it when I tell them that I could have played for five teams within 15km of where I lived in Fleet, each of them with three or four teams. Last weekend we travelled to Laval to play – about 140 miles – for a 10:00 am start. In thirty-five years of playing hockey I’ve never had to meet at 7:30am for a match, 6:45am really as it took me 45 minutes to get to where I met the team in a Supermarket car park.

We had ten players (it’s always difficult with a single team club to cover absences) but started OK, although I got a bit worried when the umpire called me over before the match started - but it was only to check my licence number against the team sheet; I never did find out which of my team tipped off the umpires to do that! I was “Le stopper” (centre-back) and Christophe our gardien (goalkeeper) made two good saves early on then after 25 minutes Adrien, my defensive partner playing “Libero” (sweeper) made the terrible mistake of saying “it’s not going too badly is it”, ten minutes later at half-time we were four down :o( The team is very enthusiastic, maybe not all are as fit as they need to be and they play on Astroturf like a grass pitch team. We grabbed a couple of breakaway goals in the second half but shipped four more including a penalty stroke I conceded, my French doesn’t permit much “discussion” with the umpires yet so, I was restricted to pointing out it wasn’t a certain goal and ask why hadn’t he seen my sweeper behind me on the goal line.

This week my first home game on the rugby pitch, the style of play on grass is not one I’ve ever come across before. It’s a bit like how Wimbledon used to play football, very direct. And it was 1-1 at half-time and quite some way into the second half before Chris put two goals away (including a crowd pleaser into the roof of the net) and their keeper (who was, as Sioux would say, as old as God’s dog) helped us to another and a 5-1 win. But the defence is getting better organised although it’s only Chris (our other English player) and I talking during the game – something about the English maybe ….

It’s a very sociable club, I’m hugely impressed with this group of people who manage to keep the presence of a minority sport alive here, think nothing of driving all over the west of France to play, are extremely sociable and friendly and have accepted a rosbif into their midst.

Another example of the very sociable nature of the club and France in general was when the father of Ugo (our captain), who had simply come to watch, recognised a new player and came and introduced himself to me on the sidelines and had a chat – that wouldn’t have happened in the UK. Another example of the British failing to get to grips with the French social etiquette was when I said “Salut” and kissed a girl who was watching in our dugout who I thought I had met before but it turned out to be someone I’d never met previously (in which case it should have been “bonjour” and a handshake) – oh well.

8:00am meet and away to Angers next week …….  on we go!

Such a perfect day

Wednesday was a wonderful day here – we were right under a big high pressure system and the sun shone from 7:30 am to 7:30 pm without a cloud anywhere. The temperature reached 21C and I was tidying up and finishing the burning as it got dark, the air grew very still and the air became very doux (gentle or calm), it was just like a balmy late evening on a campsite in August when it’s been really warm. The sun went down a huge red orb through the trees and the bats came out.

I sat transfixed on the steps to the barn with the walls radiating back the day’s warmth and watched two bats flying in the closest formation possible for twenty minutes. It must be a courtship ritual - they were often so close that it was hard to tell if they were one or two – and it went on and on back and forth along the barn wall, so close I could hear their wings fluttering. At the same time the stars started to come out, first Sirius then Riga and Betelgeuse and then the belt stars of Orion and the sky turned an inky violet colour and both the cats came and sat at my feet on the warm steps.

And I wondered how I could be so lucky as to be living in this place and to experience such a perfect end to the day.

Bureaucracy – c’est un mot Français

One of the commonest responses from people in the UK when I talked about our plans was “How will you ever deal with the bureaucracy ?” Well, mainly we’ve managed to avoid it so far but there comes a time …..

I’m in the process of re-registering our car in France. This is a four-stage process consisting of getting a tax certificate (I thought this was to show I had paid VAT on the vehicle but see later), getting the lights changed to left hand drive (eye-watering expensive due to our vehicle’s sophisticated projector lighting system), passing a contrôle technique (French equivalent of our MoT test) and, finally, registering the car and paying some other taxes (a registration charge, an ecotaux for pollution and some undefined contribution to the tax office’s summer holiday fund; I made that last bit up – I think).

So last Monday stage 1, I know where the bureau d’impots is at St Symphorien in Vannes but I looked up the website to be sure, typed in the form I needed and found out I had to go to another office on the north side of town. The SATNAV got me to within 100m but then it took me four passes up and down the road to spot the insignificant sign, then parking was difficult and when I got to the reception desk the receptionist was on the phone to someone telling them in excruciating detail why exactly she could not pay her tax bill by a cheque unless she could provide one or more of several different forms of identity. Eventually one of the other people there spotted me and came over, I explained what I wanted and he helpfully told me that I needed to go to the bureau d’impots at St. Symphorien in Vannes.

So, back to St Symphorien and another, more helpful reception where I was given a numbered ticket and told to wait outside office G. When I got there, office G was advertised as handling taxation of small enterprises so, thinking I had made a mistake in my explanation of what I wanted, back to the reception desk to be told that office G handled taxation of small enterprises and issuing certificats de fiscalité. The people ahead of me had big files of papers and were anxiously shuffling through them, once during each interview the woman clerk came out of the office, walked across the waiting area and photocopied one or more pieces of paper. When it was my turn I went in, explained what I wanted, had the correct papers and was issued an official looking certificate from a big ledger. Strangely, as the main purpose of this part of the process was to prove I had no TVA to pay, I wasn’t asked for a copy of the UK sales invoice for the car. We had some confusion as the woman didn’t know what a CRV was and thought it was a Honda motorcycle but this got sorted out, she did of course have to go and photocopy my registration document, and I had my certificat. Now, onto the Honda dealer tomorrow for the lights …..

The best example of bureaucracy remains CPAM in Vannes (Caisse Primaire Assurance Maladies – the healthcare organisation), Barbara and I went there at the very end of a hot day in August. Most of France is on holiday in August and none of those who remain do anything related to administration at this time. So it wasn’t busy, it fact it was empty and looked as if it had been for some time. We went and waited at the line in front of the reception desk until being called forward and asked for our queue number, as there wasn’t a queue we hadn’t taken a ticket to tell us the queue we were in, what time we had joined it and how many people were ahead of us – it just didn’t seem worth it. We got sent back to the entrance to get a ticket and come back to where we had just been and the man at the desk smiled and said “How may I help you?”.

Gardening One-upmanship

Last week I prepared the potager for the vegetable seed planting using my (still shiny) red rotovator (motobineuse). I have five strips of soil now warming up by the day and three more on the other side of the field in the fosse bed. After (quite a lot) of trial and error I have got the machine set up well now so it chugs along quite happily with little need for me to push or heave it around, it leaves a pretty finely dug strip of soil that looks almost ready for sowing. I was feeling pretty happy with this and our facteur (postman) commented on the work when he dropped off a phone bill on Saturday (he also described my new green post box as “Impeccable” as it now meets La Poste’s standards – it’s worth staying in with your postie!)

Lucien, our neighbour opposite, was working on his potager today. He dug his with a tractor and plough – a real red tractor with a big shiny steel plough. Not sure how I can beat that ….

Les Hirondelles sont arrivées

Like three noisy teenagers who had somehow mistakenly arrived early for a party and were self-consciously standing in the middle of the empty room talking in too loud voices …. the first swallows (hirondelles) arrived at La Basse Cour.

On Tuesday morning I walked round the corner of the house and glanced up at the urgent twittering from the power line and saw three swallows. I did a real cartoon like double-take as I took two more steps and then swivelled my head to check that I had really seen them - 15^th March and the first swallows had arrived, could that be right? They were noisily chattering to each other and flying round the house and barn roof refuelling on the insects, fifteen minutes later and they had gone – I have no idea if they were heading further north for the UK or back towards the coast to rest up before moving on.

If anyone can find any data on first arrival dates for swallows in the UK or France I’d like to see that (google something like hirondelles date d’arrivée France).

We often accept what happens in nature without thinking about it too much and we lose our sense of wonder in how things happen. Consider this however; swallows are currently wintering in Namibia and Botswana where Barbara is, she’s previously commented on them in her blog and emails. She will take 24 hours to fly from Namibia to France by jet when she returns; the swallows covered that vast distance by themselves under their own power.

The trio that stopped off at La Basse Cour may just have started their trip in Katima and could possibly finish it with any of my followers – in Lewes, Paris, Hook, Stowmarket, Southampton or Newcastle. Well … possibly not Newcastle, the Basse Cour three may be brave and intrepid but I doubt they’re daft and they’ll want a bit more warmth ;o)

Weekend update

Busy week this week. I’ve finished the stain and UV protector coats on the wooden windows (hooray !) – two coats of each. Phew. They do look elegant now though.

I saw Dominique the farmer during the week and we agreed that the chatagniers (sweet chestnuts) behind the barn would be pollarded at ground level – he said that was “normale” and it’s what Antony the tree surgeon wanted to do. We also agreed that he would come round and take his moitié (half) of the oak timber on Friday. My standard of French took a real nose dive when I was talking to him though – I couldn’t get anything out right, very frustrating :o( 

Antony came back on Friday to continue the work and I think he inspired Dominique as the dead tree at our entrance was cut down on Friday - I didn’t even realise it had gone until I walked round to see how things were going and saw the tractor going up Lucien’s drive with a huge tree trunk in the bucket. Antony told me they had used orange baler twine tied to the blue tractor to pull the dead tree away from our phone line when they cut it down! John and Antony came back to finish on Saturday and Dominique said that they could leave the brash from the chestnuts on the top field and he’d clear it with the tractor – which was nice.

So, the back of the barn is clear and all the oaks from the barn to walnut grange are pollarded with sap-pullers left on (squirrel bough has been left on too), a hazel here has been coppiced and one of the elms has been pollarded, the other young elms haven’t been done and the second cherry tree on the top boundary (behind the collapsed wine store) has had all the rotten and dead wood cut out and has been cut back to good growing points. The net effect is a dramatic big block of sky when you come round the barn or walk out of the front door. They also took down all the branches on our land that was near to our phone line or electricity lines.

We’ve been invited via Facebook to some part of a French wedding in La Baule – Adrien from the hockey club is getting married to Nelly on 25^th June.

I watched the 700^th edition of The Sky at Night with Sir Patrick Moore this week – it started in 1953. I think he’s 88 now and terribly restricted by gout but still got razor sharp wits, Guests included Brian Cox, Brian May (guitarist from Queen who has a PhD in Astrophysics) and Sir Martin Rees, formerly president of the Royal Society and the Astronomer Royal. Worth catching on the iPlayer if you missed it.

It’s cantonal elections at the end of March and so we are getting all the party fliers, it’s slightly disorientating to receive communications from not one but two political parties that publicly claim to be on the left wing of politics. The political landscape has changed so much in the UK that Adam honestly asked me what left wing meant when I was talking to him. We aren’t allowed to vote until next year in local elections (and never in presidential elections) but two interesting things I’ve read are that the road from Noyal Muzillac to us is on some plan to be widened and improved and there is a defined plan to complete the cycle route from Questembert – Le Guerno – Noyal Muzillac – Muzillac – Ambon – Sarzeau.

I went to the cinema this week which was about half full for a screening of “Made in Dagenham”, rebranded in France as We Want Sex Equality; presumably Dagenham doesn’t hold the same connotations for a French audience. The screening was advertised as an advance pre-release showing but the film came out in the UK in October so it must not have been scheduled for a French release originally. Another film made with BFC funding and another film where everyone applauded at the end – or maybe that’s just a French tradition. It was good and I enjoyed it and the Vannes cinema really is a nice facility but I must take a notebook next time as the subtitles are so useful to get the little conversation phrases that people use but aren’t in the French courses.

I’ve received my medical registration details and I have a number of admin tasks to get done this week, I need a tax office certificate so that I can import the car into France, arrange to get the car lights changed over, visit the bank and order a lawn tractor (the 10km walk every time is OK for me but I’m not sure the lawn mower will enjoy it for too long).

Everything you always wanted to know about trees in Brittany

In today's post: my French is tested (“désolé; mais nous avons coupé votre arbre …. ”), I find out why the french farmers pollard their oaks and leave that ridiculous single shoot on the top, get to use my forestry helmet working with a real tree surgeon and I build the biggest bonfire in Morbihan.

Last Friday the work started on our boundary trees, John and Antony worked on the long list of work prioritised by our safety concerns and they set about the trees with a total of four different chainsaws including a monster that John used on the cherry. The sequence of work we agreed was to start with felling the cherry by the picnic table then removing one trunk from the two trunked oak by the garage and finally felling the leaning oak by the open barn and they completed all that work and left the timber neatly sawn up on the ground and a huge pile of brash for me to burn. The cherry was in very poor condition at the top and Antony showed me where the heart was rotten right down the middle, he thinks it has been burnt at some time (lightning strike ??) and said that he’s seen ones before that have been completely burnt out by fire when the middle is rotten as it acts like a chimney. By the stage of decay and the insect activity he thought the fire had been several years ago, although he said he didn’t think it was in imminent danger of falling - probably. The split oak had a big rotten area in the middle and the tree by the barn was OK but obviously dangerous and leaning at 55°.

The next day I saw Dominique our farmer neighbour and said that I had wanted to explain to him the work that we were doing on the trees; he said he was going to come to speak to me about this as well so he came round and we walked round the boundary. He explained (very amicably) that the oak trees on the talouse were his not ours and so the wood from the trees belonged to him not us (but not the cherry which was ours). I explained that our main priority was to maintain the trees and the talouse in good condition, reduce the tree growth above the house and to let in more light. I also showed him the rotten centres to the trees and explained what Antony was going to do (maintain the pollarding and return the trees to their last cut level). I said that we would pay for the work to his trees and said I was happy if he wanted to take all the wood but (having learnt how to say this with the hockey club …..) asked him what his proposal was. He suggested that we split the wood 50:50 (I learnt a new word here “moitié” – half) and he confirmed that he gave us permission to complete the rest of the work (I think his main concern had been that we were going to cut down all the trees ….) so we shook hands on that. On the way out he said that the oaks – and only the oaks – on the field boundaries in the commune were under protection (so couldn’t be cut down) during the reamenagement foncier that is going on at the moment but – with a smile – said he wouldn’t be telling anyone about his tree that we had cut down. He also said that he didn’t think the trees had been done for 12 years.

Antony came back by himself on Friday and Saturday this week to continue the work, he’s from Birmingham, married to a French woman and has transferred his UK qualifications to France by completing a French arboriculture certification. He’s very interested in trees, has worked as a gardener at the Chateau of Villandry and talking to him during his work I found out some interesting things:

• French chênes (oaks) on field boundaries are invariably pollarded and cut back completely to the trunks with a single shoot left at the top. Last winter when we saw this for the first time we thought it looked ridiculous and had no idea why it was done. The single shoot is called a “sap-puller” in French and the theory is that it encourages the tree sap to rise maintaining the trunk in healthy condition and enabling the cuts to heal quickly.

• Our beautiful red squirrel paid him a visit as he was up one of the trees – he thinks it may have a nest in one of the high boughs - so we agreed to leave that part of the tree untouched.

• Oaks on field boundaries have a further significance in Brittany, historically the wood from them belongs to the owner (hence Dominique’s visit) but by law the twigs and small branches could be harvested by the paysans who worked the land and were tied into fagots and used for heating and cooking.

• Many chênes are hundreds of years old and were planted to delineate boundaries – certainly the 1830 Cadastre Napoléon (=land plan) that Liliane (our solicitor) uncovered when we bought La Basse Cour shows some boundaries that still exist today so the oaks are possibly at least that old.

• We also have some Elm trees in the talouse – a tree almost completely unknown in the UK now.

Antony also cut down a beautiful “knobbly knee” joint from one of the oaks to show me how fractures develop in branches and abseiled high into an ash tree to cut down a huge limb that had torn off the trunk and was hanging down from the tear point. Amazingly the wood was still alive at the tear joint and he thought it had been hanging like that for several years.

I did some of the ground work as he lifted the canopies of the oak and ash by the potager and then set to work on the massive pile of brash that had been left. The evenings are drawing out now and when the fire was going strongly I sat out until 7:45 with a beer as a blood red sun sank into the purple haze of the evening sky.

Amazing things trees ……

Update and February Review

My window work has continued – the upstairs window sets and the door into the barn are finished and I’ll start on the downstairs porte-fenetres tomorrow. My timing’s not been great so I’ve had the glass out of my bedroom windows in a week when the night temperature has consistently been 2C.

I’ve been to two seminars in the last two days aimed at expats, one in Josselin and one in Rennes, and have a lot of information about healthcare, income tax, wealth tax, pensions, assurance vie, le bouclier fiscal and lots of other things that we’ve known we have to do something about someday – I think that day’s approaching fast.

In the garden the fruit trees are all moving along, the flower buds on the peach, the nectarines and the crab apples are swelling (there are some green leaves showing already on the crabs). The currants and the gooseberries are all showing leaf and about half the raspberries have shoots pushing on. The daffodils around the fruit trees have big buds on and the ones I planted six weeks ago after I came back are through the grass on the drive and in the field. The roses – all varieties that we have grown at other houses before in our life - are all moving at different speeds; Lady Hillingdon is furthest on with three inch red shoots closely followed by The Alchymist on walnut store (bright green shoots), Paul’s Himalayan Musk has lots of half-inch shoots on and Kiftsgate is the backmarker at present but looks healthy. The clematis are growing strongly and the grass is growing very strongly indeed; grass cutting with the John Deere is effective but I have to cross the 100m wide field over a hundred times to complete it – that’s a 10km walk every time …. About half the lilies I repotted are through the soil and the potatoes I have in the bathroom are sprouting red shoots. I’m hoping to get the second digging of the potager beds done next week.

And, a review of February:

Max Temp:     13C

Min Temp:     -1C

Frost days:     1

Rain days:     11